This post is about self-improvement.
Personally, I take pride in what I do. It is important to me to be good at my job. I read articles and books, go to seminars, subscribe to coaching blogs, watch training videos, follow olympic athletes on Twitter, etc. I’ve obtained a few different certifications, not to mention a bachelors and a masters degree. I have spent a lot time gathering information, getting educated in my field; and even more time thinking about ways to apply what I’ve learned.
After all that, I’m starting to not only realize how little I know, but also how many mistakes I’ve made and continue to make along the way.
It’s easy to focus on the ways in which you believe you’ve been right, the things that justify what you’ve been doing; but I’m starting to realize that this kind of thinking may be limiting my growth as a coach.
From now on, I’m on a mission to identify the things that I’m doing wrong, my shortcomings, the mistakes I’ve been making. By calling out the ways in which I’ve failed I can hopefully take the necessary steps to improve in those areas. That’s the idea anyway. It’s not going to be easy.
I’ll admit, I have this fear of being wrong. Or maybe I should say that I have this need to always be right. It’s an ugly trait of mine and it frustrates me. It’s not something in which I am proud. I’m quick to defend myself, explain away my actions, throw in a few facts for support. In this model, the focus is on me. In reality, it’s not all about me. My job, my life, the people I work with- not about me. There is something bigger going on that is way more important.
If I want to get better at what I do, I’m going to need help. I need people to tell me when I’ve messed up. I must seek out criticism, no matter how hard it may be to accept. I have to stop getting defensive, and when I do, acknowledge it and apologize. I must take these things to heart, but not get offended; and ask questions even when I won’t like the answers. This is going to be a long and somewhat painful process, but at this point, I think it’s necessary.
Here’s to proving myself wrong.
I hope I can handle it.